Some time ago, I was up in my attic. I opened the box that contained my beautiful, white lace wedding gown. I just looked at it with tears in my eyes and thought, "what in the world was I thinking?"
Nineteen years have passed since I wore that dress. Years of struggling, enduring, moving, and crying. Then there have been years of laughter, joy, experiencing new challenges, and the happiest time of all...giving birth to my daughter.
As the "wife" I'm supposed to be the "submissive" one. I, for one, am a professional at it by now. To "submit" means to commit to the discretion or decision of another or of others, yield, surrender. We are to be "subject" to our husband which means; under the power or rule of another. Don't like it? Well, you can thank Eve. Of course we all know it would never have worked if the husband was commanded to be the submissive one, his ego would never allow it. God knew the wife would sacrifice, would not be selfish, and love her husband with all she had. Now, I'm not foolish enough to believe that all wives are as good as I am. I know there are many that have abandoned this rule.
For the husbands, remember it makes it a lot easier for us to be submissive when we do feel that we are loved, we are cared for, and sometimes, just sometimes, put our needs ahead of yours. I know there are many wonderful husbands out there. Some call their wife "beautiful" (yeah, I know....but they are out there), mine reminds me to keep using my anti-wrinkle cream that I purchased last year (see post on turning 40). Some tell their wife she looks like she hasn't gained an ounce...mine tells me to put the cookie down or I'll gain back that weight I worked so hard to lose (see post on turning 40).
So when you're saying "honey, what would you like for dinner tonight?" but really thinking...."how much is that life insurance policy worth?"...you're not alone.
I hope and pray that your marriage is all that you want it to be, but most importantly, what God wants it to be. I know it's difficult, it's been difficult for me, but rely on God. When your man here fails you, remember there is one that won't. Put your faith and trust in Him that your marriage will endure. Pray for your husband to be the husband God wants him to be and pray that you'll be the wife you should be. God bless you and your marriage.
After much consideration I decided to write my very first post on this life-changing experience. Everyone knows what a difference turning "40" makes in a person's life. Last year I began preparation for this event. I purchased many products to fight wrinkles, reduce pore size, and "youthenize" (my new word) my skin. Exfoliating, masking, and rejuvenating. I went on a very strict diet including low carbs, aerobics and excruciating ab crunches. I even tried the "cabbage soup diet." One word- YUCK! (don't listen to an older sister, they don't always know better). I went from a size 16 to a size 8! Yea!! And I am still working on it.
When I finally hit the big "40" in April, my wonderful husband reminded me that I am older than he is, only by four months. Then I realized that turning 40 wasn't such a big deal for him. He didn't purchase any products, go on a diet, or do anything to fight this battle. Why? Does he not realize that he has wrinkles, has gained weight, his pores are huge, and doesn't look anything like the man I married 19 years ago?
So, what is so different about us? Why do women fight it with every ounce of their being while their husbands could care less? Why does it bother us so much when a Victoria's Secret commercial comes on when he is in the room, but it doesn't bother him at all when the bowflex commercial comes on? (Women don't act like you don't love that commercial!)
So what am I going to do? I wish I could say that I'm not going to care anymore, let the wrinkles rage, pores enlarge, and let my backside enter the room ten minutes after I've walked through the door!....but I can't. I will continue to fight this losing battle until either I die or the Lord comes back. I plan on looking my best when I hit those pearly gates! Won't it be wonderful when this battle is over? I know that this body is going to die. God has shown me, through the process of aging, that I will not live forever in this body, but I will take on a new body. Then I won't have to worry about wrinkles, enlarged pores, or pant size. I will be perfect. Whatever that looks like, I will be.
My friend, Pastor Mike Wilkes, turned 40 eight days before I did, (I hope he doesn't mind me saying that). When I asked him how he felt about it, his reply was this, " I'll be one day closer to meeting Jesus." I'll never forget that.
So when I do feel like my age is getting the best of me, I think about what he said...I'm one day closer to meeting my Savior.
