on easter

Easter Sunday was a wonderful blessed day for me. My family drove down to Minden to Whispering Pines that morning, I sang a special "I Will Rise", heard an awesome sermon by the "Big Buck", went to my mom's house and spent the day with my parents, sisters, nephews and brother-in-law, had a great meal, ate way too much, went back to church that evening and heard another great sermon from Bro. Buck. This was also my 41st birthday. After church, we headed over to Big Buck's dwelling place because that's just what we do every time we visit. Sorry for them, it's just become a routine. My daughter goes over to see the young spikes and we follow behind and end up always staying longer than we should. Mrs. Doe is the sweetest person you'll ever meet, besides me, she endures through our ramblings. Big Buck is a big talker, many of you know that already, but I am also just as stubborn and strong headed as he is. My husband is a little more reserved, yet he does enjoy good conversation. We were discussing several things, which I won't post on here. I just wanted ya'll to know that Big Buck said I was right about something, which I already knew, and wrong about something else that I am determined to prove him wrong. Like I said, I'm stubborn and this doe won't go down without a fight. During these conversations, Mrs. Buck is falling asleep beside me on the sofa. I believe she was about to muzzle Big Buck! Anyway, we finally called it quits because we had a long drive home.

I always dread leaving. I know what comes next; depression. The next day I was so depressed I cried on my way to work, cried at work, thought about how much I hate it here, thought about how much I hate not being able to go to the church I want to go to, thought about how much I resent Joe for doing this to me, thought about how much I miss my family. And I think about why am I so depressed if I am a child of God and I am supposed to be so full of joy when all I'm full of is sadness most of the time. Good grief, I'm crying right now. I'm just waiting for the one day that I don't think about any of this. So far, it hasn't happened. Pray for me.