Thursday, March 4, 2010

on understanding

I have a hard time understanding why, when I'm so heartbroken and torn, that my Lord and Savior allows such pain and agony to persist in my life. Everyone always uses the scripture "wait on the Lord." Is this the only answer?

I have a hard time understanding that while I'm faithful in service that my Lord and Savior allows my service to be so emotionally troubled. I know that the scriptures say that we will suffer. I just don't understand why the suffering is in His house.

I have a hard time understanding that while I have chosen to follow my husband and be supportive in his decisions that he's made, why my Lord and Savior has allowed my marriage to become a constant battle to fight. The scriptures say for the wife to subject herself to her husband, well, I have.

I have a hard time understanding why my emotional suffering is not important enough to my Lord and Savior that He doesn't change the situation. I think of the scripture, "is anything too hard for the LORD?" Well, I know that nothing is, so where is my joy? Where is my peace? Where is my comfort?

I have a hard time understanding.

2 comments:

JamesCharles said...

I'm afraid I don't have any answers that will make you feel better. The truth, however, is that God does know what He's doing. The reason people tell you "wait upon the LORD" is not b/c this is the only answer of "why". They tell you this, because it is one of the practical applications that helps you know what to do. "Wait upon the LORD" does not answer why, but what to do.

The "why" is quite different. Why does God allow things to happen in our lives with which we disagree or which hurt us greatly? A few answers. #1 - We live in a world of free choice. God designed us to have free choice. His entire reason for creating us was (in my opinion) so that we could CHOOSE Him. If He takes away that free choice in any aspect, then we has defeated His very own reason for our existence in the first place. So, if God were to force your relationship into all joy and wonderful bliss, He'd be destroying your family's free will. He would, thereby, be destroying your humanity.

#2 - He has a vast and perfect plan. He allows certain things to take place, because He sees the end of them. Romans 8:28, right? What could God possibly see that we can't? Everything in the future. He may see you growing stronger from this. He may see your husband learning some things. He may see a lesson you will teach your children. He may see the eventual outcome of a stronger and better marriage by ways in which we cannot even fathom. Whatever it is, His plan includes the future as well as the present. Thus, He allows certain things.

#3 - God lets us suffer many times to be an example to others. Praise the LORD that He allowed Job to face what He did. Job, because of his sufferings, is a great encouragement to believers of all ages since it's writing. Your life can be example and testimony to others as well.

#4 - We live in a world of sin. Remember, God does NOT want sin. He does not like it. Yet He allows it for a temporary time, because anything else would be to (again) interfere with our freedom of choice.


So these are just a very few of the possible explanations as to "why" God is letting this situation and pain exist. Even so, mere knowledge of "why" does not satisfy us or help us feel better. So what should you do?

Keep on serving. Love God and your family as you have and even more. As you love God and He loves you, and you love your husband with that love (and God loves him also), your husband will have the perfect environment to love God and you back in the perfect way. Also, have faith that God knows what He is doing. He has proven it to me many times over. Finally, wait upon the LORD. Our time with trouble is short, and only for a moment.

Julie Halliday said...

to #1...i am choosing him, that's y i don't understand

to #2...i am going 2 b in the nuthouse or have a breakdown soon if he continues to allow it

to #3...i am not Job, i am tired of it

to #4...i will be sinning soon if things don't change

like i said....i still don't get it...and i'm very tired of going through it.
i cry almost every service, i cry at home, i am not happy most of the time. this is not helping my testimony